Positivity is Key

Looking back over my life I've realized I've had a lot of seconds, almost's and not quite's. I was 1st Runner up in the Miss Indianapolis Black Expo pageant. The second child in my family. I was 1st Attendant to Miss Kentucky State University. I've loved so hard and it almost worked. I thought I was up for a promotion but not quite. I've had a lot of disappointments but in the end, I'm still grateful.

Grateful that I woke up this morning. That I have a roof over my head. I have food to eat. I have a well paying job. I have a family who loves me unconditionally. I have the best friends a person could ever ask for. And I live in one of the best cities in the world!

One may ask, "How do you stay positive when you feel like your life is full of letdowns?"  My answer would be to think about all the good things that have happened in life and to press forward.

This week I read a devotional around being thankful and making sure you learn from your mishaps. You never know who may need to see your positivity, enthusiasm or gratefulness if you're constantly dwelling in your sorrows.

Stay positive and in love.

It's raining  today...the thought of trekking around in the NYC streets is dreadful on this day.  So instead, I'm having a homecation and indulging in a Sex in the City marathon.  While watching the last episode that ever aired like I've never seen it before, I stumbled across a quote that I never paid attention to before:

"Later that day I got to thinking about relationships. There are those that open you up to something new and exotic, those that are old and familiar, those that bring up lots of questions, those that bring you somewhere unexpected, those that bring you far from where you started, and those that bring you back. But the most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. And if you can find someone to love the you you love, well that's just fabulous."

It never fails how when you need something, a simple word, quote or even the smallest gesture can change your mood for the rest of the day.

This year I made it a point to really get to know and love me, flaws and all. And if you've ever attempted this, you know how challenging this can be.  But nevertheless, I embarked on this journey for myself so that I can fully understand me.  I went to therapy everyday up until I turned 30. I ran many miles on days that I felt I needed to clear my mind. I left the country for 3 weeks to get away from the hustle of my life. I read the entire bible. I journaled my most private thoughts because I have a hard time sharing my feelings with others. And through it all, I came to the woman I am now.

I still have flaws. I still have days and weeks that are difficult. I am overly sensitive because of past hurts. I still have some pounds I want to shed. I still am not who I 100% want to be in this life, but I am exactly who I need to be at this moment.

I have been dating a wonderful guy who I think could potentially love me for who I am. He is understanding, fun, smart and hella sexy. My biggest fear is being who I truly am, flawed and all, and him leaving because of it. But that should not be a fear at all. I need someone to accept me at my best and my worst moments because I can't be the person who puts on a smile everyday but is dying inside.  I hope he is the man who can provide that for me but if not, that's ok too. I know that day will come.

The best part of knowing who you are is being ok with everything that happens in your life. But know that the happiest moments, the sad ones and the hard trials mold you into the person you are meant to be.

Stay in love with yourself and the person who is meant to love you back...will.

It was March 11^th. I was in week 4 of my Brooklyn Half Marathon training and I remember sitting at my desk and my left leg was completely numb from the knee down. You know, the tingling feeling you get when your foot goes to sleep only this time, it was painful…really painful. I had to make an emergency appointment with a physical therapist. After several tests, it was determined that I had a bulging disk in my lower back that hit a nerve that was connected to my leg.  I could barely walk at the time but I had high hopes that I would be able to overcome my injury and be able to complete the half in May.  

Then April came and I still wasn't cleared to run long distances. I was devastated.  This is something that I really wanted to do for myself. I wanted to run these miles to prove that I could accomplish a really lofty goal. But I wasn't willing to run the risk of further injury so I told myself that I would sign up for another race next year.

After several months of physical therapy and 3 months of intensive working out Tapout XT style, I finally felt ready to really get back to running again.  My sister Leslie was training for a 15K that she was running to celebrate her 33^rd birthday so we created a 50 mile challenge on Facebook for the month of September.  This seemed like a really big goal to me since I hadn't really run that many miles ever…but I did it! And for the month of October we upped the ante to 55 miles!  I was ready!

I happened to be scrolling through the Black Girls RUN! NYC page and saw that there was a national meet up race happening in Trenton, New Jersey in November. I said to myself, I can do that and not only make my goal but support my sister by running a race for her birthday virtually. She lives in Chicago and I’m in New York and couldn't make her race because one of my friends was running the ING NYC Marathon.  So I signed up!

When the race day came, I felt prepared. I had done my last long run the Saturday before…11 miles! It was hard but I got them done and knew I could conquer 13.1 miles. 

I am blessed to be part of the NYC Chapter of Black Girls RUN! because we have some awesome individuals who will motivate you til the end! One of the BGR! ambassadors paced me through the entire race to make sure I made my goal.  The first 8 miles were pretty good but after that it was all downhill (really uphill because there were so many HILLS!!!) I thought I was not going to make it. The mile markers were off, I was tired of climbing those rolling hills and my calf started hurting but I didn't give up.  My God-sent ambassador, Nykia, was there for me every single step of the way.  I am so thankful for her and another one of my BGR! sole sistas Tsitsi because if it were not for them, I wouldn't have made it.

Nykia and I when we first started!

After 13.1 miles, a lot of sweat and a few really bad 4-letter words, I made it! I crossed the finish line!!! It was an exhilarating feeling!!!! I truly believe this was supposed to be my first half marathon and not Brooklyn. I was surrounded by 700+ other beautiful women of Black Girls RUN! and not only did we receive one medal, but we got two!!!

This isn't even half of the BGR! women who were at the race!

We did it!

What’s the moral of this story? Never give up! Keep striving towards your goals.  Even if you hit a major speed bump like I did, don’t give up! Your blessing is right around the corner if you keep going after it!

 Lauren D.

Sexy Preserved...

My New Set of Wheels

Today as I sit at home trying to fight off this cold, I dream of sunny days riding my new bike, cruising in the wind. It's pretty gloomy in New York City today and combined with having some serious head congestion, all I can do is sit and stare at my new beautiful cruiser. For my 29th birthday, all I wanted was a bike and because I have the best set of parents ever, I was able to get one!

My Schwinn Fling Yellow Cruiser

Before I embarked on my journey home

I made the brave decision on Tuesday to make the 8 mile ride home after my friend at work gave me a serious pep talk. Needless to say I've crossed off another item from my 30 before 30 list and I'm super excited about it! Who's up for a ride with me?!?!

Lauren D.  

My 29th Birthday!!!

Bare with me as this is my first post...

For some reason, I was very excited to turn 29. I don't know if it was because I've heard great things about being in your 30's or because I was celebrating in style in the great city of Toronto but I was overjoyed! 

The celebration started out at a party in NYC called Grits and Biscuits.  It reminds me of being back at my Alma Mater, Kentucky State University, at a Bell Gym party! 

Alex and me at Grits!

I then embarked on a couple of pre-birthday dinners with coworkers and friends and ate until I literally said "I don't want to eat ever again!" :-/ 

First birthday dessert...

My girls at the Meatball Shop!

I woke up on August 2nd ready to board the plane to Toronto! If you've never been you need to go and make sure to take Porter Airlines. They offer free complimentary drinks (including beer and wine), a sandwich box, chips and shuttle service to downtown! We stayed at the beautiful Shangri-La Hotel and I never wanted to leave. Let's just say we had an extreme amount of fun while celebrating my birthday and Caribana 2013.  Here are a few pics from the trip!

Now that I'm officially 29, I'm embarking on a journey until I'm 30. I've created a list of 30 things I want to do before I hit the big 3-0! Check out my list here! 

I hope you embark on this adventure with me! 

Lauren D.